Runners Need Not Apply

My running shoes
Originally uploaded by somebear.

“Didn’t you read the sign on the door?”

I shifted uncomfortably on the doctor’s examination table.

“Uh…” I shrugged my shoulders.

He snickered. “It says, ‘Runners need not apply.’”

I shifted again, letting out a snicker.

“Yeah, I guess we are a tough lot,” I replied.

“You guys don’t know when to stop.”

I was the case in point.

The doctor started in again. “Ever hear the one where a patient walks into a doctor’s office. He says, ‘Doc, it hurts when I do this…”

“’Yeah, so don’t do that anymore.’ Old joke, eh?”

I began to explain how my foot hurt after a typical run. I spent a week off the road, but was anxious to make goon on my New Years resolution. First, I promised myself to run more consistently throughout the cold winter. This was an exceptionally warm January, and I was well underway toward my second resolution: run a marathon by next November. Philadelphia, Chicago, New York, or Marine Corps. Perhaps.

He looked at my foot. Looked at me, and looked back at my foot again.

“To tell you the truth, I’m not much of a foot and ankle man myself. I recommend some RICE. Know what that is?

“Yeah,” I said, “rest, ice, compression, and elevation.”

“And stay off that foot.”

This sucks. Two weeks into January and I’ve already suffered a running injury; either a stress fracture or torn ligament by his account. Not a good start to my new resolutions. Two weeks rest- a minor setback. In the past year my running took a backseat to graduate school. Two weeks was a minor inconvenience, but I am back into this for the “long run” (pun intended).

I left the doc's office in hurry, certain to stay light on my feet. Two weeks...

Well, here is to a New Year and good (running) health.

Tags: running, stress facture, new years, resolution, marathon